Being True To Oneself

Have you ever read the conflict that one who is gay goes through internally when trying to determine which sexual avenue to pursue? Here is an individual who has an internal yearning one way yet societal conditioning is pushing him or her another way. Many are confronted with similar experiences when deciding whether to pursue an alternative lifestyle.

Over the last few days, I have challenged each of you to determine how you would like your sexual life to be. Most have never undertaken this exercise. Instead, they fall prey to the conditioning that is placed upon them. Whatever is considered 'normal' is the avenue followed. This takes place in bedrooms all over the world every night.

Are you one of those people who craves something different? If you are, I highly suggest looking at this aspect of your life to take some proactive control. Since sex is so personal and highly charged, anyone who is able to exert control in that area assumes power over so many others. This is something that dogma has done for centuries. Breaking free of this is the first step to freedom.

Being True To Oneself

Determining what one wants in life is only part of the battle. Many seem to feel that the most difficult part of the process is in the choosing. This is not the case. What gets really hard is to remain true to that decision. It is only after making this choice that one truly understands the power behind the social conditioning. In addition, one begin to see all the ways that society attempts to sway a person.

The example of the homosexual epitomizes how influential society can be against any alternative lifestyle. A person who chooses to follow this path is ostracized and demonized by religious institutions. He or she is labeled as immoral while being told that hell is the foregone conclusion. Another factor is that homosexual intercourse is illegal in a number of states since sodomy is outlawed. Our gay friend is now risking imprisonment for his choices. At the same time, everywhere one turns there are images of the family unit since this is what the mainstream promotes. Obviously, this brings up another issue since gay marriage is currently banned. Therefore, the family unit is reserved only for those who fit a particular model.

In the face of all these pressures, it is easy to see why one would question his or her choice. Naturally, for many, since it is an issue of sexual orientation, homosexuality is something that one does not waver upon. However, the same cannot be said for polyamory, BDSM, or swinging. These are all lifestyle choices that people make without the biological incentive to be that way. They are also decisions that society will do everything it can to demean and belittle. This is where the questioning can enter into the picture.

Is it worth it? If one carefully thought out the decisions, I can attest that it certainly is. Remaining true to one's inner core is the most difficult part of this process. To thy own self be true. The desire to rescind one's decision can hit at odd times. Probably the most trying time is when one meets someone outside the lifestyle. This is commonly when one will begin to question they way he or she choose. Perhaps happiness is possible in the traditional is the overriding thought. Of course, a review of one's personal history might reveal the fallacy behind this mindset. Most chose an alternative lifestyle since the traditional was not working. Reverting back will only lead to more of the same.

Being true to oneself is the only path to success and happiness. We all have an internal calling that will make us happy. Life is not a 'one size fits all' deal. Each of us is responsible for finding our own way. What we uncover reveals what is true for us. Going contrary to this insight, while perhaps unpopular, is not the path we need to pursue. Let your internal barometer be your guide. It will not let you down.

Click here for your version of Sexual Motivation.

The Core: Sexual Freedom

Do you crave being free? Is freedom something that you hold extremely dear? If so, I would suggest that you look at your sexual practices to determine how much freedom you really have. I say this because I am a believer that the sexual desire is one of the most powerful that we have as human beings. However, society has a way of conditioning us into behaving in ways that it deems appropriate.

Alternative lifestyles have always existed on the fringe. However, when enough people start to buy into the concepts, even if they aren't practitioners themselves, that way of life becomes more mainstream. A classic example of this is the gay struggle and how it has moved into societal acceptability. While not perfect, I would say that being gay lacks the stigma it had 40 years ago. It is a movement that garnered the attention of the masses and have attained mainstream acceptability.

The same is not true for many other lifestyle choices. We all know the attacks the Morons and other polygamous people endure. Their preference for multiple wives is disregarded by society as perverted and immoral. In fact, the secular belief has made it illegal to practice this way of life.

Nudists also face the same circumstances. Even though we enter into this world without a stitch of clothing on us, anyone about the age of toddler faces consequences if he or she chooses to get back to this natural state. The absurdity of the Gestapo idea has gone so far as to arrest people for being naked in their own homes. This is complete insanity. But, just another example of how freedom is removed by those who seek to control.

Make no mistake, the state exists for one purpose: to control. Every governmental mechanism, no matter what form it is, uses laws to prohibit behavior. It also wields it power to make the people behave in certain ways. This is true going back to the days of Caesar. Consider that the next time you hear that the government (and politicians) are here to help.

Sexual Control

Taking control of your sexual activities is one of the main methods that organizations place your under their power. Again, this is something that occurred over the last few thousand years. Sex, an act that is totally natural, is promoted as something that is dirty, perverted, and bad. Dogma and laws have followed this course forever.

Let me ask you: why, in the United States, is sodomy illegal in many states? By the same token, why is oral sex illegal in still other ones? What business is it of the government, or anyone else, what two adults do in the privacy of their own bedroom? The logical answer is that it is no one's business. But controlling the minds and actions of people is not a logical game. This particular mechanism is instilled to alter your behavior while you are in the privacy of your own home. If you will obey when alone, you certainly will fall in line when others are watching. This is their goal. Control the most private act and you control the mind. It is that simple.

Breaking free from the slavery mindset begins with questioning all that is given to you. My suggestion is to always start with sex since that is what the powerful always seem to go after. Whether it is the churches or the governments, there is always a force seeking to alter your sexual behavior. Look at all the lessons that you were taught regarding sex and you will see the truth behind this idea.

The Real Deal

The real truth is that freedom means that one can decide whatever he or she wishes. Shaping your sexual life is an important step onto the path of freedom. Resisting the temptation to buy into what society considers normal is something that requires a great deal of courage. Consider the plight of all those gay people who 'came out of the closest'. They endured horrific treatment as a result of their desire to be open and free with their sexual choices. This is just another example that freedom is never free.

My belief is that one can never be free as long as he or she is living a sexual lie. Now, I am not a proponent of the idea that living an alternative lifestyle is the only way to live. Nor do I feel that everyone is cut out for something different from the norm. For many, the life of one man and one woman living in monogamy is ideal . However, for the rest of us, this is fantasy. Personally, I could no more make a traditional relationship work than I could fly to the moon. Both activities require a certain skill set that is foreign to me. I am not cut out for either. Many that I encounter feel the same way.

Being true to oneself is extremely difficult. Making the choice to live your life as you see fit is something that most lack the courage to do. It is far easier to be a law abiding citizen while obeying the prevailing dogma that is preached each Sunday. Naturally, if this is something that you find happiness in, then by all means do it. However, if you adhered to what you were taught yet still find yourself lacking the peace and contentment that you should have, I would suggest seriously looking at the path your choose. Perhaps it is time to alter your journey.

I am a proponent of being proactive in your life. Too many, by default, are reactive. By questioning what your belief system is, you are beginning to take control of what occurs in your life. Your belief system determines how your mind processes the world around you. Changing the barometer of how things occur in your head changes your world. Happiness is a choice. However, I found it impossible to be happy when I was living in the bondage of the ideas of others. Fundamentally, until I consciously chose to breakaway, I was going to suffer. It is only after seriously looking at my sexual/romantic/intimate activities did I begin to understand how freedom was acquired. I urge you to do the same. Sexual freedom is the core to freedom in life. Begin today of getting out of the bondage.

Click here for your version of Sexual Motivation.

Freedom in Life

This is something that many talk about but few really pay attention to. Society has a way of imprisoning us. Many claim to be free but the reality is they live in total bondage. Nothing about their lives is their own. Their entire existence is spend fulfilling the desires of others.

Society teaches us to be selfless. I say that to be free we must instead be "selfish". Now, before anyone goes off the deep-end, I am not referring to being a completely self-absorbed ass. Instead, what I mean by selfish is a self-interest in one's own life. Too often we are taught to sacrifice ourselves for the sake of others. This is not how freedom is acquired.

For whatever reason, freedom is something that a person has always had to fight for. History reveals the struggle man embarked upon in battling foes who wished to hold him captive. The same concept is equally present today. There are forces in each of our lives that seek to control us. This comes from almost every person we encounter.

If you question this, take a look at your day. How much of it is spend on activities that you choose? Most find that only a small portion of their time is spent engaging in behaviors that are of their own free choice. For example, our work hours are dictated by other people whether it be a boss or a customer/client. After hours can be occupied by family responsibilities with children and spouses taking the lead. Finally, we know how institutions such as governments and other dogma promoting entities try to control what we think and do. In the end, freedom is only an illusion.

Obviously, if everyone assumed total freedom in their lives, society would be afflicted with anarchy. Total freedom is also something that is not readily possible. However, this is not much of a concern since most of the populous is adept at falling into line with the prevailing mentality of the day. This is where you are able to separate yourself from them.

Freedom in life starts in the mind. Making a conscious choice to look at all of your beliefs helps to move one in a direction away from control. This "rebellion" unearths how enslaved one truly can become. Adhering to the wishes of others all the time is nothing more than turning your life over to that person. People do this every day of the year.

I tell people to first determine what they want sexually. So many try to fit into society by maintaining the proper sexual relationship. We are all taught that we are to meet the right person, get married, and start a family. And this is exactly what most people do. However, we are seeing more than half these arrangements ceasing because this is not the path to happiness. The dogma of old might not apply to your life.

Therefore, look at your sexual desires. This is the key to your freedom. Do you desire something different? Are you gay or bisexual and afraid to explore that part of yourself? Do you desire a BDSM type relationship? Is the single path better suited for you? Or are you poly and seeking multiple relations at the same time? All of these choices are valid and available to you. However, they will be nothing more than fantasy as long as you are unwilling to look at your beliefs. These are the things that will enslave you. Breaking free of binding ideas is one of the major steps towards liberation. Consider taking that step now.

Click here for your version of Sexual Motivation.

Sex To Control

Do you realize how powerful an organization or institution must be to control your sexual behavior? This is something that occurred throughout the ages with little sign of stopping. We can look at many different eras such as the Victorian Age if we want to realize the lengths some entities will go to exercise this power. In fact, the history of the church is riddled with this outlook.

We all know sex is natural. At the same time, we also know that almost everything sexual that we can imagine was tried somewhere before. Many of the things that are taboo were once considered acceptable practice. Certainly we see differences among parts of the world today. Some cultures will practice polygamy, as an example, while other promote monogamy.

So what does this all mean? In my mind, and as I explained throughout my book Sexual Motivation, sexual freedom is something that you really need to strive for. Dogma is established to take this away from you. The overriding values of the day are meant to persuade you to behave accordingly. However, adherence to popular dogma only creates mediocrity. If you want to be Elite, you must free yourself from this mindset.

Realizing that organizations use sex as a means of control is the first step in breaking free from their bondage. This is true regardless of who is promoting the dogma. Anyone who pushes for control of your sexual state is looking to control you. Sex is just the vehicle they utilize. Again, if they can control your sexual behavior, they can control your entire life.

Sexual Motivation is all about breaking the chains of bondage so that you can use your natural desires for success. Part of the process is to understand how imprisoned you are by the ideas of others. Ask yourself where your beliefs about sex came from? If you are honest about it, you will have no idea. They were ingrained in your over a period of years. Again, we see the overriding belief presented as "normal". Anything outside that is consider perverted.

My philosophy entails getting honest with ourselves. Sex is something that can be used for tremendous good in our lives. Yet, because of the intense sexual repression most of us grow up with, sex ends up destroying more than it creates. Some of the most powerful men in the world were taken down by this single desire. Admitting that sex is a powerful force in driving us can turn it to our advantage. My belief is if it will drive me, I might as well benefit from it.

History proves that sex can be controlled if people allow it. Starting today, take control of your life by making your own sexual decisions. Do not allow the mindset of others to infiltrate your mind. Be a conscious chooser of how you live your life. Begin the process by looking in the bedroom. This is your first step to freedom.

Click here for your version of Sexual Motivation.

Oral Motivation

As most readers know, I live an open sexual lifestyle. For this reason, I am freer to experiment with different ways to motivate myself. For those who live the same way, many of the suggestions I offer can be directly applied. However, the same holds true for those who are involved in monogamous relationships. Sexual motivation works regardless of who is delivering the sex.

It is a well known fact that any guy loves a good blowjob. By the same token, most women love to have their pussies eaten out. Oral provides us with some of the most fantastic orgasms we experience. I know many who would rather receive oral as opposed to getting laid. It is something that we find highly intoxicating.

Society deters the notion of offering sexual favors as rewards. People who do this are either doing something illegal (prostitutes) or morally incorrigible (sluts). The bottom line is that society likes to control all aspects of life and sex is the most powerful. Condition people in that area and you control all the rest.

Nevertheless, I take exception to this idea. I think that sex as a reward is a wonderful way to motivate a spouse. As mentioned, one of the best ways is to offer oral sex. It is a simple premise to do: tell your sexual partner if he or she does (blank), you will perform oral sex. If you are dealing with a guy, watch how fast he jumps to accomplish what you set down for him. A blowjob will motivate even the laziest guy to do the worst of tasks. Offer it and he will do (cumming comes later).

Many will claim this idea is sick and perverted. However, those who are willing to try it will quickly determine that motivation is nearby. If you find there is something that you were badgering one to get done, offer oral sex as a reward. In most instances the action will be completed by sunset. The motivation that was lacking for so long is instantly found. It only required pushing the right buttons.

Oral sex as a reward is a powerful way to get things done.

Creating Your Life-Start With Sex

People are often wondering how they can change their lives. They spend thousands of dollars on products in an effort to find that magical nugget which will completely transform their lives. Sadly, for most, they never uncover it. Instead, they follow the same path of "quiet desperation" that was the theme their entire life.

My belief is that most people lead lives that someone else chose for them. Few people ever take the time to consider how they got where they are. Going one step further, almost nobody ever questions how their belief system arose. Instead, they simply take for granted that what they believe is correct. Well, how did those beliefs get there? The answer is someone else ingrained them in that person's head.

Societal conditioning is one of the most powerful external forces we will ever face. It comes at us from all sides. When you look at the development of a child, there are numerous influences upon him or her which leave lasting impressions. In short, the entire thought process is created by others. These people are parents, teachers, religious folks, politicians, and peers. Simply put, we are a product of our environment.

Why do people in Boston root for the Red Sox as opposed to the Yankees? Why do we believe in equal rights while those followers of Islam consider women second class citizens? The answer is that people are conditioned by others to believe what they do.

Society has a way of taking complete control of a person's life. Most people, in this country at least, end up married. Why is that? The reason is that is what is expected of people. An alternative choice is not readily offered. People who choose the "single" lifestyle are questioned whether they are gay or not. Hell, now even the gays are asking for marriage. It is societies magical elixir. It is what "normal" people do.

We are also taught to be responsible by getting a good education, going to work, and paying our bills. This is what good citizens do. Few are taught techniques which will promote financial freedom. Society wants us to take the conservative road because, as the recent economic crisis shows, wide-spread gambling by a culture can have catastrophic consequences. Nevertheless, most people follow these tenets precisely.

Even our sex lives are determined for us although few ever consider this reality. The majority of people are heterosexual. I believe this is something that is biological. However, there still exists a great prejudice against people who are homosexual although that stigma is diminishing. The same is true for transsexuals, polygamists, and people into S&M. They are called perverts and shunned. That there is something wrong with those people is the common belief. They do not fit into society's idea of "normal.

Even in the heterosexual arena sexual behavior is dictated by others. The conditioning applies to people in all walks of life. There is a belief which determines how people are to behave sexually. Even in the privacy of their own bedroom, they are still influenced by what is deemed appropriate by others.

I once had a relationship with a woman which became sexual. This woman was from a strict religious background meaning that our sexual encounters were a sin (according to her belief). Also, she has it in her mind that sex was only suppose to go to a point. In other words, she had a preconceived notion of what "good girls" did. Her idea limited her lack of willingness to stray into anything she considered deviant. This made for an extremely boring sex life. Of course, believing anything different then what she was taught was unfathomable to this person.

Here is where you can begin to take control of your life. If you truly want to create a life that is yours, start by creating the sex life you desire. Consider all the sexual possibilities that exist in the world. Do you want polygamy? Does swinging interest you? Are you bi? Is the wonderful world of BDSM of interest to you? These are all sexual practices engaged in by normal people everyday. If they are of interest to you, why aren't you pursuing them? The time has come for you to decide what you want.

Being sexually honest with yourself takes courage. Everywhere you turn in society, there is some faction telling you to go against what is true to you. Remember, stability is what society is after. That is why it conditions people the way that it does. If you have fallen victim to this mindset, start by questioning how you live your sex life. You will be amazed how much influence others have on your "private" act.