The Opinion of Others II

This is a follow up to a post form the other day titled The Opinion of Others. It is suggested that you read it first.

The opinion of others carries a great weight with many people. It is one of the forces which prohibits the taking of action. Many allow what others will think to affect their decisions. Sadly, they allow the opinion of others, real or imagined, to dictate the quality of their lives.

Those who attain great success are able to banish out the thoughts of what others will think. It matters little to them. They operate from the premise "To thy own self be true". Often people are left standing on their own. It is then that one will uncover the resolve that resides within him or her. Some of the greatest successes occurred after others thought the person should quit. The Kentucky Fried Chicken story epitomizes how persistence has rewards.

That being said, there is a flip side to this discussion. There are ways to use the opinions of others to your benefit. Certainly we all know they will exist since nobody lives in a vacuum. Those closest to us have a way of expressing the thoughts they are having. It is best if we learn to use these tidbits of personal outlooks for motivation.

The example that best exemplifies this is exercise. Everyone knows that exercising makes one healthier which should improve the quality of one's life. Yet is this the reason that people do it. If you went to a gym and ask everyone in there why they were working out, I surmise health reasons would be low on the totem pole. The top answer would do with the fact that people want to look better.

Why do people want to look better? If you think about it, unless you are standing in front of a mirror all day, it is doubtful that you can see yourself and what you look like. This is not true for others. They can see you and see the differences in your physical demeanor. One who loses a far bit of weight receives immediate gratification whenever someone comments on how much better he or she looks. This is the payoff. The health results are an added bonus.

As you can see, the opinion of others can be positive on us if we use it for motivation. Whenever we are tired and want to blow off a workout, we need only think of the accolades awaiting us from those who are closest to us. This is where other's opinions can be helpful.

To take it one step further, what if the accolades came from the opposite sex? How much more impactful would this be? Everyone harbors the desire/fantasy to have the opposite sex swoon all over him or her. There is not a guy in the world who would not want to be treated like Brad Pitt. At the same time, most women want to have the attractiveness of Jennifer Aniston. The sexual appeal which eludes most of us is a tremendous motivator.

We all know sex sells. This is a truth in all walks of life. We live in cultures which base a great deal on physical attributes. People tend to do better when they have the physique society wants. Those who remember this are motivated by these external opinions for the betterment of themselves.

The other area that society puts emphasis is as it pertains to money. Money = success. This is the basis of judgment in the Western world. Those with money have power, prestige, and the trophy wife. It is that simple. Money is a tremendous motivator.

When it comes to money, does one want the actual currency or the numbers on a bank statement. Of course not. What is wanted is what the money can attain. Again, we go back to the power, prestige, and, most importantly, sex. It is the primary driver for so many of our decisions.

Money allows us to enter into an exclusive club. Have you ever noticed how a Kia is not considered a "chick magnet"? Why is that? Simple. They are easy to attain. Compare this to a Porsche which has a price tag 6-10 times the amount of the Kia. Only the most successful can drop this type of money on a car. This is what separates those people from the rest of us.

So how does this motivate one? Those who move into this income bracket have to work at a level that is not experienced by others. The successful work hard while building something that others cannot (or will not). Also, they take risks for higher rewards than the average person is willing to assume. While this might be a bit simplistic, the idea of being able to get most any person of the opposite sex is a primary driver. Often it is occurring without one's conscious knowledge.

The opinion of others can drive us to act. It has the ability to motivate us to create fantasitic outcomes which we would otherwise shy away from. The desire for sex is the greatest emotion when harnessed for good. Other will judge us in a way which will eventually lead to sex. Consider this in all that you do. Try to determine how you will benefit sexually from creating the life that you crave. Think of things which will make others envious. Envy is nothing more than an opinion which tells another person they want what you have. When you are at this point, you have used this outlook to your favor. Do what drives them crazy.

Use the opinion of others to your benefit. Be careful of what you focus upon since this technique is a double-edged sword. However, as you can see, it can be a force which propels you forward rapidly.

Mindset for Success

Have you ever noticed how your expectations create the experience that you have? It is a proven fact that your mindset plays a crucial role in the success that you achieve. Like the old saying "whether you think you can or can't, you are right".

Everyone has fear, worry, and doubt. The difference is that the successful are able to cast aside these thoughts while taking action. At the same time, the unsuccessful allow these things to stop them. It is the primary reason why people succeed or fail.

Life is an action sport. However, it is the mind which typically dictates what action will be taken. Procrastination is a result of a thought process that prevents moving forward. The idea of "doing something later" is the default mindset for those who struggle with putting things off. It is the mindset which determines what is done.

Results are also a condition of the mind. Many disciplines profess the power of a positive mindset. Our lives are a reflection of what goes on in our heads. Those who believe they will succeed do.; those who do not, don't. If you have the mindset that an event will be boring and uninteresting, that is exactly what it will be. Our mind creates the outcome.

We see this play out repeatedly in the dating world. The guy who has the courage to ask a girl out while maintaining an attitude of confidence that she will agree (confidence, not arrogance), usually succeeds. The one who asks in a timid manner often experiences rejection. His mindset sabotaged the entire process.

The same situation plays out when it comes to sex. Those who approach the opposite sex in a manner which shows there is sexual interest and confidence will get laid. Sadly, many take the opposite track. They believe that women aren't interested in sex. They are sold on the idea that romance and emotional connection are what they want. This is true for many. However, there are a lot of women who are horny and want to get screwed. Those who understand this fact can move in an appropriate manner.

Success starts with knowing what outcome is desired. After that, it is crucial to have the mindset which says "I am going to achieve this outcome". Basic sales training teaches to enter a presentation expecting to get the sale. You have nothing to lose. Unfortunately, people are often conditioned to think the opposite way. They expect to fail and are surprised when things work out the way they want. This is a recipe for failure. Consistent success required a consistent success mindset. Begin by expecting only positive results today.